Today i woke up feeling shit. I don’t mean physically. I woke up feeling sad, annoyed, frustrated and just shit. I made a classic mistake and reached for my phone. There on Facebook and instagram i see pictures of beautiful bodies, exciting lifestyles, successful people, happy people, people in love and it made me feel even worse. Instead of focusing on what i do have it made me think about what i don’t. I almost started to feel sorry for myself but then i caught myself and said ‘No. I chose to feel good now’
Rewind a few years, a few months even and i would have just assumed that was my lot. I would have attempted my day feeling like this. I would have gone out into the world feeling sorry for myself and feeling like the world was out to get me. Not anymore.
Now i use these feelings as sign posts. They tell me i’m out of alinement and balance with who i really am. When i feel like this i try to workout what thought or belief i have that is allowing me to feel this way. Today is was ‘I’m on the wrong path’ ‘Im lost’ ‘This will never workout’ ‘being positive about life all the time just isn’t realistic’. I had to laugh to laugh at the last one. Once i worked out what the thoughts were i could let them go because i realised how silly they were. I realised that when i feel happy and positive it’s pleasurable and that is how i want my reality to be. After all it’s our choice how we experience our time here on planet earth.
That wasn’t the end though. I made myself a cup of green tea, had a banana and i picked up a book that i knew would reinforce my believes. Once i had read a chapter i then started to think about all the things i had to be grateful for . My friend coming to see me, amazing comments on my new youtube video, my tea, my banana, my flatmate being there to say good morning, my cousin in Australia messaging me, my bestie in the Caribbean sending me love and so much more. I’m alive and that’s reason enough to say THANK YOU.
Normally when i write something like this someone will say to me that they are experiencing something really difficult in their life and it’s impossible to feel grateful. I understand because that was me. I would say exactly that. I would defend my negativity and i truly believed i was right. What i would say now is even when something terrible happens you can find things to be grateful for. Now i’m not suggesting that we shouldn’t be sad or unhappy about these things but what i am saying is it possible to try and find the positives in and around the situation and use them as your focus. Why? Because what feels better? It’s always your choice.
Love and light,