Today is Monday. I love Mondays because there symbolise to me a fresh start and a new beginning. In truth every minute is a new beginning and a another chance to start or stop whatever you want.
I have always had love hate relationship with exercise. I love doing it but I struggle so much to motivate myself to get into a regular routine. Sometimes I manage it for a couple of months but I seem to always slip up. Once I get to the gym or go for that run I have the best time but getting myself to that point is always the hardest. One thing I will say is that I have never given up trying.
Travelling has given me a great excuse to not exercise regularly. It’s given me a whole list of excuses. From not wanting to get up early and disturb people in my hostel room to not knowing where is safe to go and train to not wanting to look like some idiot doing exercise when everyone is having a good time.
Recently I have really started to look at my and why I can’t stick to a routine. I have started to look at why I find the motivating myself so hard. This after all is something that improves my mood, increases my energy levels, makes me feel great, is good of me, I enjoy it and yet I’m constantly trying to avoid it. It does’t make sense. It almost seems weird I would avoid something that means so much to me and is so good for me.
It’s sometimes really difficult to ask these questions of ourselves because the answers are often hidden somewhere within us and they are hidden for a reason. These things can make us our own worst enemy. It’s really hard to look at ourselves and ask questions of ourselves but if we want to see change it is a must.
Our minds may allow us to hide from the truth, they may allow us to carry on unchecked and not asking questions of ourselves but if we want change for our own lives and the world then we must look deeper and be prepared to get uncomfortable.
That’s what I’m doing. I’m asking these questions of myself and looking for the answers. I’m not being hard on myself. I’m not being horrible to myself. I am just asking and then quietly and gently awaiting he answer. You might ask who am I awaiting the answer from. Me. I have come to realise that there is something within me that has all the answers. Some call it intuition. Sadly as is with most of our most important natural gifts we learn quickly as children how not to use them. We stop listening to our intuition until we don’t hear it anymore. Until when we do here it we don’t trust it. Once I realised this I decided I needed to retune. We have such amazing gifts at our disposal but we don’t know how to use them.
I have said it before and I will say it again. YOU are the most important thing YOU have. YOU are worth working on. Your relationship with yourself deserves your love and attention. The relationship we have with ourselves is the foundation for all other relationships. If you truly love yourself and someone doesn’t treat you the way you want to be treated you won’t get angry or annoyed you’ll just walk away. You won’t give your precious energy away. You’ll know and trust that that relationship wasn’t for you. You’ll go back to working on you until someone just shows up and you just know.
I used to think it was cheesy when I was a teenager and people said ‘until you love yourself you can’t love anyone else’ now I know that to be true but I would also add to that ‘until you love yourself no one can love you’. You might be reading this thinking ‘but I hate myself and so and so still loves me’. I don’t dispute that they tell you that they love you but do you truly feel it? To you feel fulfilled by their love or is there still are part of you in need of more? I ask because I know. For years no amount of love was enough. If I’m honest I may have believed people when they told me for minutes or hours but then the feelings and thoughts that ‘no one loves me’ would creep back in. After all of some says to you do you like spicy food? You have never tried spicy food but you have seen other people try it, you have watched their reactions and listened to what they say about it so you feel you can say ‘yes I like it’ but you are saying yes only to a perception of what spicy food is not to spicy food itself a because until you have experienced spicy food within yourself how can you really be sure it’s what you imagine it to be? I’m not sure that made sense but I hope so.
Happy Monday. Make your relationship with yourself priority and all kinds of amazingness will come from it.